Yep, 2 out of 3 ain’t bad. Pipes were used in battle to scare the cr*p out of the enemy.
As an instrument of war, bagpipes were made illegal by occupying Brits during the jacobite rebellion.
Golf, whiskey and bagpipes...
Wha’s Like Us – Damn Few And They’re A’ Deid
By Tom Anderson Cairns
The average Englishman, in the home he calls his castle, slips into his national
costume, a shabby
raincoat, patented by chemist
Charles Macintosh from Glasgow, Scotland.
En route to his office he strides along the English lane,
surfaced by
John Macadam of Ayr, Scotland.
He drives an English car fitted with
tyresinvented by
John Boyd Dunlop of Dreghorn, Scotland.
At the train station he boards a train, the forerunner of which was
a steam engine, invented by
James Watt of Greenock, Scotland.
He then pours himself a cup of coffee from a
thermos flask, the latter invented by
James Dewar, a Scotsman from Kincardine-on-Forth.
At the office he receives the mail bearing
adhesive stamps invented by
James Chalmers of Dundee, Scotland.
During the day he uses the
telephoneinvented by
Alexander Graham Bell, born in Edinburgh, Scotland.
At home in the evening his daughter pedals her bicycle invented by
Kirkpatrick Macmillan, blacksmith of Dumfries, Scotland.
He watches the news on his
television, an invention of
John Logie Baird of Helensburgh, Scotland,
And an item about the
U.S. Navy, founded by
John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland.
He has by now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation he picks up
the Bible only to find that the first man mentioned in the good book is a
Scot, King James VI, who authorised its translation.
Nowhere can an Englishman turn to escape
the ingenuity of the Scots.
He could take to
drink, but the Scots make
the best in the world.
He could take a rifle and end it all but the
breech-loading rifle was invented by
Captain Patrick Ferguson of Pitfours, Scotland.
If he escapes death, he might then find himself on an operating table injected with
penicillin, which was discovered by
Alexander Fleming of Darvel, Scotland.
Or under
anaesthetic, which was discovered by
Sir James Young Simpsonof Bathgate, Scotland.
Out of the anaesthetic, he would find no comfort in learning he was as safe as the
Bank of England founded by
William Paterson of Dumfries, Scotland.
Perhaps his only remaining hope would be to get a transfusion of guid Scottish blood which would entitle him to ask
“Wha’s Like Us”.
Slàinte mhath!
-Will (Dragonfly)