It turns out this story has a good ending and the controversy was short lived. It turns out the owner's step daughter is stepping aboard for this one race. She is the normal skipper, but has missed this season with a maternity leave. Her coming back takes away the problem, though I need to have the deed holder reconsider his rule. Thanks for all the comments. This issue came up once before and if/when it does again, I now have some good ammo.
I just want boats out there and you guys are right that it is only a small minority that make a stink over stuff like this. The important thing is to learn how to ignore the whiners and have fun.