Dock Queens

[Nereussailor]

At one time or another,we've all had a Dock Queen next to us. You know.........the guy that keeps his boat immaculate, and never leaves the dock. I've got one next to me now that's left his slip twice in 8 months, and he's driving me nuts. I'll explain further.
A few weeks ago, My wife and I were heading out for a day of sailing. It was 75 degrees with winds out of the SW at 20-25 kts. (pushing our boat up against the sea wall) We were expecting gusts up to 30 with a slight chance of a thunder shower, according to the weather report. If you live on the East coast of Florida, this is a comon weather report We put a reef in the sail before we even left the dock. We were packing up our stuff when Dick came over to chat. He asked us if we needed any help shoving off. Dick's boat is in front of ours up against the sea wall. His boat is a 42' Blue water boat and sits about 8' in front of ours. Behind our boat about 6', is a boat lift with a 25' Aqua Cat on it.
We get everything set, warm up the motor for a few minutes, undo all of the dock lines and Dick pushes us off. As we're going forward, we see that we're not going to clear his boat. The wife is on the bow getting ready to push off, and I'm at the helm with the motor in full reverse. Our bow pulpit just touched the leveling fin on his outboard motor hanging on the rail. At this point, Dick is standing on the dock flailing his arms screaming "REVERSE, REVERSE" as I'm already going backwards. He starts muttering something about damage to his boat and keeps ranting for about 5 minutes. I get tied back to the dock, check his boat, and see that there's a white mark on the fin of his dinghy motor about 3/4" long. Now mind you, this fin is flexible. At this point, Dick is on the back of his boat still muttering about damage. I ask him if there's any damage, and tell him I have insurance if anything needs to be repaired. He keeps muttering, but doesn't come up with any. I finally tell him we're going sailing and that if there's any damage, call me, and we'll get it fixed. He says to Call him when we're coming in so that "We don't have an incident like this again". We take off again, this time I pushed off so that we would clear his boat. as the bow was coming out around his stern, I turned the wheel to port so that my stern would clear his. Dick is standing on the dock, flailing his arms again, yelling "TURN TO PORT, TURN TO PORT" All I could think was that his name fits him well. To make a really long story short, we sailed all day, had a great experience with a squall with 45kt winds, and returned to the dock without calling Dick, only to find him there still muttering. The first words out of his mouth were "Why didn't you call?" At this point, I ignored the comment, and asked him if he found any damage. He said "No" and kept muttering. Finally i told him that if there wasn't any damage, to just drop it. I said that I'd had enough fun for one day, and that I didn't need to hear about the damage any more. He asked me why I went out knowing that it was going to be windy, and that was the last word I let him get in. I went off on him telling him that I wasn't a dock queen, and that I sailed my boat. Sailing when it's windy is what sailboats are meant to do. Why even bother owning a sailboat if it's just going to sit at the dock. He had mentioned earlier that week about his boat going through a lot of zincs and that it might be something to do with my boat so I had to get in the line "Anything else you'd like to blame on me?" That was pretty much the end of it, except that he went to the guy that owns the dock and started the rant with him. He told him that if there wasn't any damage, to just drop it.
So my question to you is, How would you deal with a guy like Dick? He actually asked the dock owner to cut down the 4 king palms that are about 6' from the dock because the branches might fall and hit his boat. The dock owner told me that if he wasn't so good at paying his slip fees, that he'd have been gone a long time ago, so I pretty much have to put up with him until he sells/moves his boat or dies. I don't think that's happening anytime soon.

 

[seanshine]

Probably a great post, and I've had a real queen docked next to me. Fun days.... heh heh. Anyway, these eyes can't read that font. Try again.

 

[Weasel]

Nereussailor;

I know of what you speak, but we don't have any Dock Queens that are immaculate. No, our Dock Queens are coated in spider poop, mild and mildew. Occasionally they have drop board that rotted away and the boat is half full of water. It never fails to amaze my wife and I that some people spend approx. $4,000.00 per year and let their boats sit. Of course they don't care about the neighbors. We try to keep our boat pristine, but across from us is a DQ, mold, spider and bird poop all over it. I have had to drain the cockpit 2X and now the sails are starting to rot off. Nothing our dockmaster can do, he pays his bill. Wish he would pay my dock fee! Really pisses me off!

Weasel

 

[Smithy]

My suggestion is utterly cruel, but mostly harmless:

A handful of birdseed in his cockpit as you leave the dock next time.

 

[Weasel]

Oh yeah, you might see them once in 2.5 years, they motor out and never fail to get towed back in. Serves them right.... of course they don't clean the boat before or after.

 

[kpgraci]

my advice...move. Transfer to a deiiferent slip when one opens up. Some people just can't be good neighbors.

 

[Joe]

My advice...... change to a more readable font... it was truly annoying reading your post, and don't waste any energy on your neighbor. If he is unbearable....... ask the management to move to another slip and tell them why... then forget it.

 

[Florida sail]

I recently had the same problem with a next door neighbor. On the rare occasion that she did leave the dock my boat was in extreme danger of damage. In addition she had this full width step ladder screwed to the finger dock right in the way of my boarding or departing my boat. When the marina refused to take any action I moved to a slip across the street.

 

[100 Ton]

I had a neighbor that moved his boat 2 times a year, launch and haul out.

 

[kenn]

yeah... that font...

I do understand the sentiment, but to each his/her own, so I don't think you had the right to go off on the guy just because he was a DQ. Also... you did hit his boat, however slight, and while he was around. That seldom goes well.

Maybe the marina can give you a slip a little closer to the action, so you don't have to maneuver around said DQ.

 

[RichH]

Just about every marina has a major DQ or mega-control-freak / anal-retentive. You cant ever change someone's personality by 'negotiating' --- only solution is to move your boat to another slip.
Normally once you become involved in an adversarial episode with a total anal-retentive, forevermore you will eventually become blamed for bad weather, delayed trash pick-ups, spider poop, failed wax jobs, blowing dust, falling stock market, etc. etc. etc. etc. ... and it will invariably escalate from there. Best is to 'run away', get your slip changed. ;-)

 

[mark_swart]

I've had a dockmate sort of like that -- always planning for the big getaway, always pushing it back, always tinkering with one more thing. However, my dockmate was a good guy and always willing to drink a beer and shoot the breeze, so it didn't really bother me!
In your case I can see both sides, because I probably wouldn't be too thrilled if there had already been a close call. Still, sounds like he was a bit over the top.
That's something I've found interesting, and I think it is really a peek into the psychology that drives each of us to sail. Some of us will sail if the boat can move at all. I'm in that group, and the flipside is that I always procrastinate on boat projects in favor of sailing. Some of us piddle and clean and don't leave the dock until it's perfect. I see it every summer -- people piddle all spring (during the good sailing), go out on 4th of July and sit there in the hot and calm, sails flapping as the motorboats and jetski wake kills what little momentum they may have had. Then they call it quits on Labor Day, just when the sailing is getting good again.
Definitely to each his own. I'd personally rather see the immaculate boats that never sail than the once-nice ones dying a slow death of neglect.
Still, I'd just look for a new slip. Maybe you could convince another DQ to switch with you so they can all 'nest together'!!

 

[MLampner]

I share a finger pier with a DQ. It is a beautiful boat, an older Columbia with lots of wood. It to the best of my knowledge has never left the dock during the past season other than haul out.

My boat a 77 Hunter is a running boat, that means the Teak is not always pristine, the lines not always roached etc. The folks that own the DQ are a mixed bag he is rather sour, not simply about his declase neighbor but life in general say to him its a nice boat you get back its OK. She is charming and always inviting us to join them for a beer.

As a new sailor I am always terrified I will hit him on backing into the slip, particularly as my Hunter walks badly in reverse and so getting in is always a challenge. None the less having a DQ, particularly a unique boat next door has one big plus. Can always find my slip.

 

[JK_Boston_Catalina310]

Worst yet a DQ power boat

We had one next to our boat last year. This one was a power boat that maybe left the dock 3 times all season. He almost hit our little C&C 24 with the 30+ power boat with twin screws that he could not control. He also refused to put fenders out on our side of his boat, only on the dock side.

Last September we were predicted to get a hurricane. It was predicted to hit mid-day on a Friday. My wife and I were down at the dock Thursday afternoon, adding fenders, dock lines, taking down sails, etc. to be ready for the storm. It was 8PM and he still had not shown up to do anything to prepare his boat. He was on the windward side that the storm was predicted to hit from and only had two dock lines holding his boat off of mine and had no fenders out but two sitting in a bow rail holder. I decided to not chance that he was going to come down in the morning and redid his dock lines, adding a few from my extras, and put out the two fenders, one against the dock and one against our boat.

I heard from a friend that lives on his boat that the guy came down the next day (after when the storm was predicted to hit) and bitched about me going on his boat. No thank you for setting up his boat for the storm and he stole the extra dock lines I used on his boat.

Earlier last year, in July or August, it was a hot windless day so we didn't go out sailing (wind was less then 5knts:cry. So I was laying in the cockpit taking a nap when I was woke up to a strong chemical smell. I look over at his boat and he has four gallons of bleach. He was pouring them into his water tank without using a funnel or even care with pouring so it was all over his boat and going in the water. He then turned on his deck shower and ran it onto the dock to "rinse out" the tank while adding more water from the hose. He has some "brown stuff" coming out of his faucets. I asked if he used a water treatment and he looked at me like I had three heads. He had now idea what I was talking about. So I graded an extra couple of tablets we had and showed him. I offered him a couple but he refused saying he was fine because he saved the fourth gallon of bleach to put in the tank to stop the brown stuff from coming back. I started to say something about the environmental impact of what he was doing but then figured it wouldn't matter and just took the dog for a walk.

As to your problem with the apply named Dick, it is typically my experience with guys like that, that they are scared or uncomfortable taking their boat out due to lack of experience. They want to sail but don't have enough experience to feel comfortable in anything other then the picture perfect 10-12 knts of wind with a clear forecast. (Can't say I didn't used to be one of them) I usually try to make friends with those guys. Then I get sail bigger boats then I can afford. Might be too late for that with Dick.

 

[Maine Sail]

I am having a hard time understanding how or why the fact that your neighbor is a "dock queen" has to do with anything?

So if he kept a spotless boat, and made every attempt to keep the value of a vessel he paid a lot for up, yet he also sailed it multiple times per week would there then be no issue?

People use all products differently. There are thousands and thousands of SUV's running around this country that have never seen a dirt road or snow. Thousands of six figure RV's that spend entire seasons in parks and never move, what they were built for. There are thousands of folks with sports cars who never take them over the speed limit and thus don't use the product to its full potential. None of this has any bearing on the guys personality or if he acted like a dick or not.

Let's look at this another way, perhaps from the other party's point of view (there are always two ways to look at a situation);

1) A guy spends 150k on a boat and then finds his wife does not like going off shore very often but does enjoy hanging out at the dock. The husband also likes to tinker, clean and maintain his investment that he may someday sell or convince his wife to go sailing more but for now he is content maintaining his investment at the dock as the view is better than home. So that is how they currently use their investment. That is their prerogative.

2) The guy next to him sails his boat often but arguably lacks expertise in boat docking skills and has made contact with his vessel before so he is now very cautious knowing that this guy is reckless enough to venture away from the dock when winds prevent him from doing so in a manner that prevents boat to boat contact. The owner of the hit boat knows the other owner is lacking the proper skills to not come in contact with his 150k investment and is rightfully concerned. He also knows that touching up gelcoat or Awlgrip and getting a good match is a fruitless effort that would not pan out well and that paint work damage, even small scratches, takes time, haulouts etc. etc. to fix and he does not want to spend more weekends at home than necessary cause he actually enjoys using his boat the way he does, as a dock side condo.. He is rightfully concerned about his investment given the preceding events that have transpired.

3) After the "incident" he asks the owner who hit him to simply call him before coming back in so he can be prepared to help with docking and, if necessary, fend off the boats from making contact again. The other owner refuses to make and who thought he was making a reasonable offer the owner who hit him refuses to be courteous and make the call.



Just because someone sails their boat or uses it as a dock condo does not make them any more entitled to smash into someone else's vessel. This is not an issue of a "dock queen" it is an issue of inadequate boat handling and the resulting personality clash between two parties.

I agree with the others that you should ask to be moved. If one can't handle their boat in the space provided and can't run it without making contact with another vessel then they should seek to move their slip for the safety of all. Perhaps sticking to conditions where they don't run a risk of physically impacting their neighbors vessel would be prudent?

If I was that guy I would have likely been nervous and upset as well. Part of knowing how to sail in 45 knots is also knowing how to dock and control your boat on the departure and return.

People react and treat assets differently. Many folks think nothing of slamming a door into your car and causing a dent and are then oblivious when you approach them about it. I actually had a lady do this to me on a brand new company car, 500 miles on it, and cause $625.00 in damage. She was offended when I asked for her insurance info after the door was severely dented, the molding ruptured and the paint ground to bare metal. "Oh it's nothing I don't see why you're so upset about this." The police were eventually called and sided with me because the dent was so egregious and vicious. She was largely obese and literally kicked her door open to exit the vehicle despite looking directly at me sitting in the car before she did this.

Even with the police reprimanding her and telling her she was at fault, and liable for the damages, she was far to belligerent to understand that some folks don't like to drive around with every body panel smashed in, as her car was.

Rude can beget rude and it seems both of you might have provoked this situation. Dick was probably a dick but I would have to guess you did not help the situation with a possibly "entitled" or superior attitude about how you use your boat and he does not.

Dock queen or not I see as having no bearing other than for the "sailor" to claim more "entitlement". So if I hit an SUV that has never been off road and I just came from "off roading" with mine am I entitled to have this attitude or feel entitled to claim it was only minor rub and that person is being a dick for being upset that my vehicle collided with theirs? When they get upset should I call them a "road queen" after I hit them?

People can use their boats however they want and for what ever reason. Personally I have no issue with dock queens if that is how they get enjoyment out of their boats. Me, I prefer to actually sail my boat and to keep it clean. If he was die hard daily sailor, who kept a pristine boat, would it have been any different?

Just playing the devils advocate here..

 

[RON20406]

Ifind it interesting that only one person, Mark, showed any sympathy to your "dock queen." Boating is many things to many people and the fact that the man does not sail his boat regularly is no reason for condemnation or criticism and is certainly none of your business. The fact that he maintains his vessel in bristol fashion should not be a negative, but rather a positive and shows his deep care for his vessel and his high attention to detail. And, the fact that he is concerned for his vessel when you leave in less than ideal conditions means that based on previous experience he may not feel comfortable with your boat handling skills when aprroaching or leaving the dock or the overall condition of your vessel. Any damage to another vessel, no matter how small, is unacceptable unless in extreme unavoidable conditions. If this bothers you, you should move to another slip and be surrounded by people with a more cavalier attitude to boat maintenance and docking manuevers. I always will remember a massive Irwin 42 ketch leaving Chub Cay marina in the Berry Islands in a 30-40 knot blow because they had to meet people in Nassau the next day. As they left the slip, they were caught by wind and current and when they finally turned towards the channel, hit a Westsail 32 and completely ripped the davits off the rear of the boat. No one was aboard the Westsail and no one in the marina, other than me, or on the offending vessel reported it to the marina. They were grossly irresponsible in leaving in those conditions with the potential for disaster and failing to report the damage .Your conditions may not have been the same, but the feeling of insecurity it gave your neighbor must be recognized. And finally, to Smitty who, perhaps tongue in cheek, advocated throwing birdseed on the "queens" boat, you should be ashamed as a responsible boater for such a mean spiritied and reprehensible comment. Finally, I would imagine any decent sailor with a nice boat, including my own, would love to have the "dock queen" as his neighbor. Best, Ron

 

[RichH]

I am having a hard time understanding how or why the fact that your neighbor is a "dock queen" has to do with anything?
<SNIP>
Just playing the devils advocate here..

So just exactly how long was that white mark that Nereussailor put on your boat?

 

[Deadline]

I rather like the large font, easier to read.
Hilarious if frustrating story, reads like a George Carlin riff.
I agree you should move when a new slip opens up.
Life is too short.

 

[Stu Jackson]

Then there's the OTHER kind of DQ: the pig sty.

We have a next-to-us boat, a nice mid-80s vintage Pearson 33. Well, it used to be nice. The guy who owns it used it as a "babe magnet" and got his at-the-time girlfriends to come and help him do his limited teak work. He finally found the final "her" and he hasn't been back to the boat in six years! The boat's cockpit fills up in heavy rains and with the louver he has into his port locker, it gets close to sinking each winter. The wood's a goner, and those of you who know Pearson's know they have this nice wood strip at the gunwale all around, to say nothing of the handrails and cockpit. The nice off white boat is now almost completely black on deck, the running rigging is gross, the mainsail cover is in shreds and roller furled jib is starting to go. His docklines are about to be toast, too.

Jim has a Catalina 36 Mark I on his other side and he's a liveaboard and keeps his boat spotless, just as we try to do with ours.

We have both started writing to the harbormaster about this boat, to no avail. Guess he pays his rent every month, but our marina requires that boats be in good shape to even be able to sign up for a slip. Guess there's no clause for keeping it in good condition.

So, having a nice neat boat as a dock neighbor, whether he goes out in the boat or not, is much, much nicer than our situation.

 

[Nereussailor]

Ok, I think a few of you missed the point. First of all, I do understand what mainsail is saying, but Dick isn't the friendliest guy around. He had issues with me before I arrived at the dock and I never met him before in my life. He didn't like the guy that was there before me either and He probably won't like the next guy thats next to him either.
I get along with just about everyone I meet and give everyone a fair chance before I judge them. Second, I never would have hit his boat if he wouldn't have been the one pushing off of the dock. I did it myself the second time and had no problems so I won't be asking him for help again. I have had one other incident leaving a dock back when I was about 19, and never had any type of "incident" with his boat or any others around. It's an easy slip to get in and out of. Also I've been sailing since I was 12. I'm now 45. I'm not saying I'm the best sailor in the world, but I'm not a greenhorn either. I care about the other boats around me, and wouldn't want them to be damaged. but shit happens. We don't want it to, but sometimes it does.
As for Dick, and that is his real name, I'd love for any of you to be his dock neighbor for 8 months, you'd be pulling out with no intentions of returning too. We are not in a marina, so we can't just ask another slip. It's a private dock (sea wall) with two slips. His and mine. With slip fees being what they are here, and waiting lists at the marinas, I can't just move. I like it where I am, except for Dick. The dock owner and I get along really good. If anyone's leaving a slip, it will be Dick. The dock owner can't stand him either, but like I said, he pays his bill on time.
One question I do have is why would anyone spend $100,000 on a boat work on it all the time, never sail it, and call it an investment? I understand that everyone is entitled to use their boat the way they want, but my question is Why would anyone in their right mind do that? Boat's aren't investments. There might be a few that are, but a typical fiberglass boat isn't. If anyone thinks that they need to make an investment, PM me, I've got a boat for you to buy.
Last but not least, Smithy I'd love to do that, but it's not my style. It sounds fun though. I'm sure you meant it as a joke, but others here get offended by things like that.