Most comments concern compression loads.
I would be more concerned with the load being a "pull".
The OP said the pole was rigged to the mainstay.
This arrangement could easily pull the stay out of its fitting at the crosstree/spreader.
These fittings are often hidden under a plastic boot and do deteriorate.
I would keep the ends of the whisker pole and look for a replacement pole of the correct length
The outward pull loads or tension loads would be relatively small and infrequent. They might occur after the genoa collapsed and then filled again pulling at the end of the pole. That might cause the damage you mentioned.
The compression loads, however, are larger and steadier. The force is transmitted from the clew through the sheet which goes through the end of the whisker pole, part of the force is compression, forcing the pole towards the center of the boat, while the rest goes to the winch. If these loads were low, a winch would not be necessary.
The shrouds are designed to take vertical loads from the masthead to the keel. A high sideways load will cause a significant imbalance between the port and starboard shroud tension. This is a cause of concern because these sidewards loads are not part of the rigs design. A few years back I read Brion Toss's book,
The Complete Rigger's Apprentice. He goes into some detail about rig loads and how to calculate them. It was an enlightening, if challenging read.