What would you do

[higgs]

I have sailed Lake Michigan for over 25 years and live 70 min from my boat. My wife is not particularily active in sailing, but is very good about giving me a long leash as I came with a boat. I can go cruising a month or two at a time - no problem. She joins me for short stretches. During the season I spend most weekends aboard - sometimes she joins me. I would like to move closer to my boat, but my wife, who is shy, has good friendships she does not want to leave to move up near the boat. Her family is from the Buffalo area and she would agree to a move along the Southern Shore of Ontario - an hour's drive from her home and family and friends. There are some really quaint little towns with harbors along the south shore, which I found pretty appealing. I must confess, I am a little fearful about leaving my friendships and my yacht club. I have pretty much been to every port on L. Mich. and a new cruising ground would be refreshing. Stay where I am and feel comfortable - and am happy - or search new horizons, leaving the old behind?

 

[Ross]

I may be

of an age that can help. Cliches are fun "if mama ain't happy ain't nobody gonna be happy" . I get the sence that swmbo ( she who must be obeyed) would be pleased if, during your absences, she was closer to family. I suggest that this be a topic of quiet discussion and careful consideration. No doubt you enjoy you affilation with your club but I would be supprised if you didn't fit in with a new club on another cruising ground. You didn't mention employment so I presume that it is not a large factor.And that is my 2 cents worth.Ross in Bel Air

 

[Rick D]

Both

I live 100 miles from my boat which is in Los Angeles. My wife is similar to yours except she likes the boat itself, just not long cruises. I have been in the same marina for 35 years.We sometimes take a slip in another marina for a few months. We have done so in San Diego and may do so in Mexico this year. That might mean a couple of hundred miles, but it's only temporary, and would be a fresh area. She would get to explore a new area.So, that's what I'd recommend. Try a new area out for a month or two. If you really like it better than where you are now, you can move. As for moving your residence, I think that would be asking too much of your wife. Still, you should discuss it with her. Maybe you'd be surprised at her response. Good luck; Rick D.

 

[r.w.landau]

If momma ain't happy,....

ain't nooooobody happy. (like Ross said)higgs, this is one I would workout ,or not, with best friend you have, your wife.r.w.landau

 

[higgs]

landau

My best friend is my wife no doubt. She wants to go. The decision is mine. She is cool and is not putting ANY pressure on me. She would be content either way. The hesitation is mine.

 

[higgs]

Ross - good reply

I am recently retired. Property values in the new local are about half what they are where I now live. The other half would be content to stay where we are. Thanks for your input.

 

[Kevin B]

Some food for thought

Higgs, You say the Buffalo area and 1 hour drive. That 1 hour sounds too far to make a lot of daily round trips, especially if she will be driving into the city proper.....what is rush hour traffic like in Buffalo....will it keep her from wanting to travel at certain times of the day? Also, in winter you are on the lee side of Lake Ontario and are going to get a lot of lake effect snow especially this time of year. That's not going to make driving into Buffalo any easier. Better to make sure she won't be housebound in winter if she doesn't like driving in poor conditions.

 

[Franklin]

To answer

If I was in love, I'd deal with the drive and see if I could make it more interesting for her to want to go and not ask anything of her like to move. If I wasn't in love, find a new woman. I'm currently looking for a woman that likes to sail. If she doesn't, I don't want her, no matter how cute she is.

 

[Paul F]

Great Lakes

I lived in Racine and sailed on Lake Michigan for many years. This idea could work for you. Sail the boat to Buffalo next year. Rent a house or apart. for a few months and see if it works for both you and your wife. I've moved around a lot sailed in six states on small and big water, always found good sailing and sailing friends.

 

[Ken Palmer]

I take Rochester over Buffalo

If you live in Buffalo, you would probably sail Lake Erie. I have never sailed Lake Erie, but know that it is a shallow lake with all the hardships that come with that. Perhaps some of the readers from Buffalo will come to its defence.I have lived in Rochester for the past 25 years, and find it a wonderful sailing community. We have two major yacht clubs, a good racing program, and a new waterfront area that is finally being devoloped for the boaters. You can visit the website below for a small view of Lake Ontario and all that it has to offer. I like being close to the Toronto area with all of their yacht clubs and friendly sailors. The south shore of Lake Ontario has ports about every 15 miles or so with yacht clubs sharing reciprical privleges with the Rochester clubs.Rochester is about 1-1/2 hr. drive from Buffalo. We don't usually get quite as much snow as Buffalo, that is on the Lake Erie snow belt (winds out of the west). Rochester does get lake effect snow from Lake Ontario, but not as much as the south-eastern end of the lake.I live less than a 15 minute drive to my boat and couldn't begin to think about moving further away. We do much more cruising now that I am retired, but also an active day sailor and part-time racer with the Genesee Yacht Club.Originally from Michigan, my wife and I are both happy with this area and sailing, as she loves to sail too. She refers to herself as the "owner-manager", and I am the skipper that must listen to the higher authority.Have fun in your quest.

 

[kjmessner]

Wilson or Olcott are other good options!

The port at Wilson or Olcott are also on Lake Ontario, but a bit closer to Buffalo than Rochester. Wilson has a nice Yacht Club -- I sailed out of there years ago when I lived in Buffalo and found it a great place to sail from -- very convenient and easy to get back and forth, also very plesant sail to Toronto, and the yachting community was fantastic!

 

[George]

Right on,

Franklin, your right, she must be cute, but she also has to sail!

 

[higgs]

Thank you!!

I think I am going to Wilson. I have been checking on homes in the area and am amazed at the prices. Lakefront homes cost less than the cheapest shack in my area. No house payment, live on the lake, 10 miles or less from my boat, and my wife happy. Life's Good!!! Now it is time to start planning for a great cruise through the lakes. I figure on leaving Racine mid June. I will spend several weeks in the North Channel - go up the St mary's River and poke my nose in L Superior so I can say I have been there - and continue on to Ontario. I can get there as late as early October, no problem. Great responses here were really helpful so thank you to all who chipped in. Comments here truly were a factor. Now, what ports along the way are must sees and don't gos. L Mich is very familiar, so I know it. I do plan to stop at or near Mac Is and will hit Hessel as well. The rest is where I would like some advice.