I am writing an article about silly/stupid things that sailors have done that got them in trouble. Any stories?
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J
Jon
If he could only dog paddle!
One cold day last fall a sailor at one of the city lakes in Omaha was taking in a late season sail with his dog, no PFD. Now the lakes in Omaha are made from dammed drainage and as such tend to be long and narrow. Makes for a busy sailor. Well this guy managed to fall overboard and apparently damned near drowned 200-300 yds from shore. (At this lake you are never more than 300 yards from one shore or the other.) His heroic dog successfully ran his boat aground while an even more heroic passer-by saved the increasingly desperate sailor from drowning/hypothermia by wading/swimming out to him and pulling him into the shore. With a PFD he could have dog paddled to shore.
One cold day last fall a sailor at one of the city lakes in Omaha was taking in a late season sail with his dog, no PFD. Now the lakes in Omaha are made from dammed drainage and as such tend to be long and narrow. Makes for a busy sailor. Well this guy managed to fall overboard and apparently damned near drowned 200-300 yds from shore. (At this lake you are never more than 300 yards from one shore or the other.) His heroic dog successfully ran his boat aground while an even more heroic passer-by saved the increasingly desperate sailor from drowning/hypothermia by wading/swimming out to him and pulling him into the shore. With a PFD he could have dog paddled to shore.
B
Bob Camarena
Thief
I read about a non-sailing thief (I think this was reported in Latitude 38, a San Francisco based sailing monthly) who stole a sailboat in southern CA with intentions of sailing to Hawaii. The owner was one of those people who don't see their boat for months on end. His first notice that his boat had been stolen is when he was contacted by the authorities that his boat had been found drifting off the coast of Japan with the half-dead thief aboard.
I read about a non-sailing thief (I think this was reported in Latitude 38, a San Francisco based sailing monthly) who stole a sailboat in southern CA with intentions of sailing to Hawaii. The owner was one of those people who don't see their boat for months on end. His first notice that his boat had been stolen is when he was contacted by the authorities that his boat had been found drifting off the coast of Japan with the half-dead thief aboard.
S
Steve O.
I
Ike Cook
Arrrrr
An old, salty, sailor walks into a bar. The bartender says to him, "Excuse me Cap'n, did you know that you have a ship's wheel in your pants?" The sailor replies, "Arrrr, it's drivin' me nuts."
An old, salty, sailor walks into a bar. The bartender says to him, "Excuse me Cap'n, did you know that you have a ship's wheel in your pants?" The sailor replies, "Arrrr, it's drivin' me nuts."
S
steven f.
good one Ike
Several years ago my wife and I used a mooring in Sarasota. After a day of sailing the winds all but died. While sailing/drifting up to the mooring I just missed it. My wife took it upon herself to dive into the water for the pendant and save us another five minutes of light air sailing in a tight mooring field. Took me years to teach her that trick....
Several years ago my wife and I used a mooring in Sarasota. After a day of sailing the winds all but died. While sailing/drifting up to the mooring I just missed it. My wife took it upon herself to dive into the water for the pendant and save us another five minutes of light air sailing in a tight mooring field. Took me years to teach her that trick....
P
PR (Initials to hide my identity
Racing tricks
Ok – here are a couple of racing tricks that I have either done or had done to me. The first is more comical than anything else. Let’s call it ‘where did he get that wind’. You need a night race, when it is really dark, and very light air. It also helps to be in the lead of your fleet with a lot of very competitive sailors. You start by playing your stereo very loud. Now all of the boats behind you can only see your stern light and hear your stereo. Once you have established your presence and they have gotten accustomed to the distance and sound, you take a sheet of wax paper and put it over your stern light (you might have to do this with your compass and other instruments but usually there is enough distance between boats where they can’t see these). You also turn down your radio a little. As time goes on, you keep adding wax paper and turning down your radio. On a really still night you can hear the other boats talking about you, changing sails, or trying to tack into your wind. They all think you have your own private source of wind. I am amazed how well this works even if the other boats can see the shadow of your boat. Apparently depth perception is all messed up at night and we rely on the intensity of the light and the sound. This one is more malicious. We were racing and were neck to neck with another boat. All of the sudden a number of bent washers, broken cotter keys, etc. came raining down into our cockpit. Immediately we went up into the wind to see what we had broken and the other boat sailed away. Apparently, the other boat had thrown all of this stuff into our main sail where it rained down into our boat. We were really mad (beat him in the race). This one is just for a good laugh. Go to one of those sign makers that will create custom bumper stickers. Have him make up some that make fun of other boats in the fleet, or say something like point at my boom and ask “how did you get it to do that”. Before the race raft up with the unsuspecting boat and place the bumper sticker on the stern quarter of the boat (if you put it too far forward the crew will see it when the hike out). It is amazing how much attention something stuck to the nice white hull will get from the rest of the fleet. Be prepared to buy the unsuspecting captain a number of drinks later in the bar. This one is a derivation of the last one. Go to an automotive store and purchase some of the static stickers. These are the ones that hold on using only static electricity. Get to the docks early and decorate other boats in the fleet. It is amazing to see a fleet of boats sailing around the lake with flames going down the side or a tiger mouth on the front. Of course you need to decorate your own boat so you will have plausible deniability.
Ok – here are a couple of racing tricks that I have either done or had done to me. The first is more comical than anything else. Let’s call it ‘where did he get that wind’. You need a night race, when it is really dark, and very light air. It also helps to be in the lead of your fleet with a lot of very competitive sailors. You start by playing your stereo very loud. Now all of the boats behind you can only see your stern light and hear your stereo. Once you have established your presence and they have gotten accustomed to the distance and sound, you take a sheet of wax paper and put it over your stern light (you might have to do this with your compass and other instruments but usually there is enough distance between boats where they can’t see these). You also turn down your radio a little. As time goes on, you keep adding wax paper and turning down your radio. On a really still night you can hear the other boats talking about you, changing sails, or trying to tack into your wind. They all think you have your own private source of wind. I am amazed how well this works even if the other boats can see the shadow of your boat. Apparently depth perception is all messed up at night and we rely on the intensity of the light and the sound. This one is more malicious. We were racing and were neck to neck with another boat. All of the sudden a number of bent washers, broken cotter keys, etc. came raining down into our cockpit. Immediately we went up into the wind to see what we had broken and the other boat sailed away. Apparently, the other boat had thrown all of this stuff into our main sail where it rained down into our boat. We were really mad (beat him in the race). This one is just for a good laugh. Go to one of those sign makers that will create custom bumper stickers. Have him make up some that make fun of other boats in the fleet, or say something like point at my boom and ask “how did you get it to do that”. Before the race raft up with the unsuspecting boat and place the bumper sticker on the stern quarter of the boat (if you put it too far forward the crew will see it when the hike out). It is amazing how much attention something stuck to the nice white hull will get from the rest of the fleet. Be prepared to buy the unsuspecting captain a number of drinks later in the bar. This one is a derivation of the last one. Go to an automotive store and purchase some of the static stickers. These are the ones that hold on using only static electricity. Get to the docks early and decorate other boats in the fleet. It is amazing to see a fleet of boats sailing around the lake with flames going down the side or a tiger mouth on the front. Of course you need to decorate your own boat so you will have plausible deniability.
K
Ken Cobb
hypothermia
At the Tuttle Creek Reservoir near Manhattan, KS late last fall, three college boys went sailing in a small boat on a very windy day. They were all good sailors, and undoubtedly thought it would be sporting to sail in high wind. Had it been August, a knock-down would have presented no problem, for the lake is fairly narrow, and they could have hung on to the boat indefinitely. Only one of the boys had a PFD on. They failed to consider how cold the water was, and how little time they would have to survive if they were dumped. When they didn't return, a search was mounted. The boat was found turtled. One boy was found floating dead in his PFD. The other two bodies were never recovered, and presumably sank in the cold water.
At the Tuttle Creek Reservoir near Manhattan, KS late last fall, three college boys went sailing in a small boat on a very windy day. They were all good sailors, and undoubtedly thought it would be sporting to sail in high wind. Had it been August, a knock-down would have presented no problem, for the lake is fairly narrow, and they could have hung on to the boat indefinitely. Only one of the boys had a PFD on. They failed to consider how cold the water was, and how little time they would have to survive if they were dumped. When they didn't return, a search was mounted. The boat was found turtled. One boy was found floating dead in his PFD. The other two bodies were never recovered, and presumably sank in the cold water.
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