Calming fear
Mark, I have tried and tried to calm the fears my wife and son have about sailing. They are just fine when the boat is upright with just enough breeze to ruffle the sails. Their fears seem to increase exponentially with the wind speed and amount of heel. Whenever I find a picture of a sailboat heeled over I show it to them and explain that that is what these boats are SUPPOSED to do. I've also been going out in more and more wind as time goes by to build them (and myself to some extent) up to it. Last year we were out in what we later found to have been a small craft warning where we got rolled onto our port beam by one really nasty gust. It was a bit scary at that moment but a really good thing in retrospect. One- I now leave the radio on. When we went out it was a clear day and there was no mention (TV forecast, marine forecast, weatherbug) of anything other than great weather. Two- I now pay more attention to what is going on around me. There was no significant change in the clouds prior to the wind. There was, however, a marked reduction in the number of boats out. If you have to wonder why everyone heads in with such beautiful weather you may want to batten down the hatches. Three- When the weather does start to change suddenly, drop or reduce sail. I have yet to install reef points on my main so I'll probably drop sail and motor in. Four- and for us maybe the biggest, the BOAT can take it even if we can't. Yeah, it'll roll alot further than you are comfortable with but it will come back (at least under most conditions). Panic has no place on a boat, most of the time. In this instance my then 11 year old son witnessed his entire young life passing before his eyes as he yelled something to the effect of "We're all going to die!!!" as he flung himself down in the cockpit. This move was beneficial in that I could then reach past him and grab the mainsheet and let it run. My wife simply froze, clutching the jib sheet for all it was worth. I would have preferred her to let it out as well but it at least gave her something to do other than join our son on the cockpit floor. It also left her in a position where she could help trim the jib as we came about to run for our slip. After we got into some more sheltered water we were able to discuss how well the boat had taken care of us and how stable it really is. Now when we go out in stuff that we would have hesitated about before we know that we and the boat can take it and we have a lot more fun. Just get your brother-in-law out in one good blow. After that, everything else is normal. -John