J,
You brought up some good points for sailing your boat & how this makes your wife feel more relaxed & comfortable. That's a great level of compromise & for sailing enjoyment.
However, it was your last paragraph that I don't agree with. Allow me to explain.
I looked at your public profile & see that you sail in Guntersville lake, AL. RED on the other hand, sails in a lake in Colorado. He had mentioned of the surprise wind changing conditions & its effect that makes his wife uncomfortable. I have to believe the weather patterns & topography determine differences between both of your sailing locations. What he experiences, you may not.
I owned a C22 for a few years in the Tampa Bay area & can tell you that conditions change quickly here also. I experienced similar situations in wind & seas. Sometimes, it was, "White knuckle", so I can emphasize with what his wife was experiencing. I had guests in fear on my boat for sometimes, Mother Nature will throw you some surprise curves just to see if your paying attention. I have sailing friends whose wives no longer sail because of being in a bad situation when sailing.
They also have two young children to think about & I get the feeling at sometime, he would want to include them also. With this in mind, his sailing parameters differ somewhat from yours & others in this thread.
Then, we had some that went off on tangents about the problem being proper sailsets & tack angles related to his size boat & how to correct this. But remember again, that was not what he was asking, he wanted feedback on maybe moving up to and purchasing a 25CD as a compromise to insure his wife's comfort/enjoyment level.
Given this info. I would not be surprised if his decision is the 25 CD. It would more fit his, "Family style" of sailing. With sailors, the styles of sailing that fit them best, works well.
We guys, we run on Testosterone, women on the other hand, run on Sensibility. It's all good, everyone is different thus, everyone's sailing styles may differ also.
CR