Lets get our terms synchronized (notice I did not say correct). We had a big discussion on this a while back and I don't want to repeat it.
SO for the purpose of this thread the wind angle we are talking about is the direction the wind is going over the deck (yes apparent wind)
With that said, what I hear you saying is you can't "get upwind" much more than 90 degrees (beam reach) from the direction the boat is pointing when the wind is coming directly down the center line of the boat (in irons)
Consider for a minute that the apparent wind is a product of both the boat speed and the true wind speed. So when conditions are light you (all of us actually) have trouble pointing. In 4 knots of wind I can make 2-3 knots of headway so the direction the wind is over the boat is something like 60 degrees from in irons. As the true wind speed picks up you can point "higher" (less angle between the tacks) for the same reason.
Ice sailors have this problem in the extreme (they can go 70 mph in 20 mph winds!!!!) Every way they go is beat due to their speed.
What you have to do is build up speed and turn into the wind SLOWLY over the course of 5 minutes or so. Build boat speed, re-trim, turn a little into the wind, build speed............repeat till you are making your own wind and going in the direction you want.
Key to all this is keel,(deeper is better) and your boats ability to sail very closely hauled. You might want to consider getting a barber hauler or making one.
Or just wait till you have more wind than your boats hull speed.