When is it appropriate to swallow the anchor or march inland with an oar over your shoulder? What factors drive it? Health? Age? Tired of boating? Spouse or lack thereof?
Swallowing the anchor
- Thread starter Peter Brennan
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Once I gave up my first love, rock and ice climbing...
... for a time. After about 5 years, I went back to it. I was ready, it was fresh, and I looked at differently, in a more mature way.
Perhaps just sell the boat and give it a rest. Perhaps it is the boat of the local sailing you are tired of. Perhaps a trailer boat, just for day sails and without the maintenance. They go to weather at 60 mph.
Perhaps some backpacking. Biking. Perhaps you'll come back to sailing, someday, if you miss it.
... for a time. After about 5 years, I went back to it. I was ready, it was fresh, and I looked at differently, in a more mature way.
Perhaps just sell the boat and give it a rest. Perhaps it is the boat of the local sailing you are tired of. Perhaps a trailer boat, just for day sails and without the maintenance. They go to weather at 60 mph.
Perhaps some backpacking. Biking. Perhaps you'll come back to sailing, someday, if you miss it.
I like Stu's comments relating your thoughts to reefing. Makes sense. I just got back from my boat after being isolated for several days because of snow. But everything was fine below although several of the dock lines had ice on them and there was ice in the harbor.
But what keeps us going? I'm at the end of seventy eight and still sail--mostly in the summers but i use my boat the year round as a hide-a-way, office, cave, napping place, etc. I love my boat. My wife doesn't come with me anymore--she has other interests so my boat is my own. My hour or so aboard this morning will be the highlight of my day.
I have rigged it for easy of sailing. All furled sails, the WinchRite to furl and unfurl them, a Max prop so I can control the boat under power, a good head (required at my age), and a place to heat water for tea. The stereo works well and I have my Kindle to read to my hearts content.
Now if spring would only come.
What will make me give up my boat? I don't know. I can't see the lack of interest, I'm still fascinated with boats. My biggest threat is losing my mind. That scares me but I think the boat helps me think. I think about it much of the time.
However, Stu, good comment. When should we reef? After I pass on.....
But what keeps us going? I'm at the end of seventy eight and still sail--mostly in the summers but i use my boat the year round as a hide-a-way, office, cave, napping place, etc. I love my boat. My wife doesn't come with me anymore--she has other interests so my boat is my own. My hour or so aboard this morning will be the highlight of my day.
I have rigged it for easy of sailing. All furled sails, the WinchRite to furl and unfurl them, a Max prop so I can control the boat under power, a good head (required at my age), and a place to heat water for tea. The stereo works well and I have my Kindle to read to my hearts content.
Now if spring would only come.
What will make me give up my boat? I don't know. I can't see the lack of interest, I'm still fascinated with boats. My biggest threat is losing my mind. That scares me but I think the boat helps me think. I think about it much of the time.
However, Stu, good comment. When should we reef? After I pass on.....
Thinwater that is good advice. We have a trailerable Starwind 223 and it is amazing how quckly we can navigate I-95 to get to a choice sailing venue for a few days.
Les, I liked your reply ... it's a good feeling to know that this can last. I've gone thru a lot of different phases in my life and sometimes it bothers me that I don't do all the things I used to do. I always skied a lot and there was a time when there was only one season that I couldn't wait for and that was winter. Ski racing and then my kids ski racing kept us at a frenetic pace for so many years. All the other seasons were easily filled, too. In the midwest, I dabbled in competitive water skiing and sailed my Hobie just to keep up a non-stop stream of activity. Then we moved to NJ and water skiing was no longer logistically feasible at a competitive level and I hated trailer-sailing so I started windsurfing. That became the most addicting activity of all and also extremely selfish with regard to my relationship with my family. It was a main factor in ending my 1st marriage.
Sue and I still love skiing, but we are more than satisfied to keep it limited. Traveling to New England constantly gets too tiresome. When it was clear that windsurfing had run it's course with me, we bought our sailboat and I couldn't be happier about it except that Sue wants it to be convenient and I want more space to explore. But without the time, convenience wins out and we keep her on LH.
I really miss windsurfing and wish and want to go back. I have a lot of 12-year old equipment that is in practically brand new condition, because I stopped so abruptly. I can't sell it, much as Sue says I should - it's probably not worth selling now. I also really miss ski racing and think longingly about all of those adventures. All the training, traveling and races I went to with my kids were the best times.
Sailing is filling a lot of desires for me and the maintenance and planning for improvements has such a different intrigue that is different from my earlier years. I really look forward to years when we can sail more. But I also hate looking forward too much. There are times in the summer when the sun is too hot and I look forward to the cooler weather and winds of October. In March, I look forward to launching the boat. But the seasons go by so freaking fast that I really don't like the thought of looking forward!
Sue and I still love skiing, but we are more than satisfied to keep it limited. Traveling to New England constantly gets too tiresome. When it was clear that windsurfing had run it's course with me, we bought our sailboat and I couldn't be happier about it except that Sue wants it to be convenient and I want more space to explore. But without the time, convenience wins out and we keep her on LH.
I really miss windsurfing and wish and want to go back. I have a lot of 12-year old equipment that is in practically brand new condition, because I stopped so abruptly. I can't sell it, much as Sue says I should - it's probably not worth selling now. I also really miss ski racing and think longingly about all of those adventures. All the training, traveling and races I went to with my kids were the best times.
Sailing is filling a lot of desires for me and the maintenance and planning for improvements has such a different intrigue that is different from my earlier years. I really look forward to years when we can sail more. But I also hate looking forward too much. There are times in the summer when the sun is too hot and I look forward to the cooler weather and winds of October. In March, I look forward to launching the boat. But the seasons go by so freaking fast that I really don't like the thought of looking forward!
From my own experence after living aboard and cruising on our 38' Island Packet.
1. Health. The remission I had been enjoying had ended?
2. Maintenance, How hard is it to keep up a boat in the southern sun? Damn hard. With an investment this large you don't even think about skipping something. We could do all our own repairs but it's still costly.
3. Lack of sailing. Taking a boat out for a day sail while living aboard full time isn't easy. Everything must be put away to go, everything on deck must be cleaned when returning.
4. Spouse's enjoyment. Does your partner really share your passion as much as you? Would she like more grandkid time? Mine did and that was good. Many times the husband is the sailer and the wife is new to the sport. DO NOT scare her showing off your skills! Biggest mistake we heard about.
5. Cost. A true crusing boat that you plan to sail 500 to 2000 miles off shore is a bit more expensive than a daysail boat or coastal cruiser.
6. Risk. Many boats can't be insured for their true value when sailing those 500 to 2000 miile offshore.
We love the fact that we actually sold the farm (truly did) and fulfilled our dream of cruising. If we hadn't done it then it would have never happened. Now back home we can enjoy the family as much as needed and with 3 sailboats to sail we can do what ever type of sailing we want.
What would we do different? We would buy a cheaper boat (something you could live with if lost)and kept the house. We would have kept the boat in the area we wanted to sail in for a couple of years and then enjoyed every day.
Just Do It!
Ray
1. Health. The remission I had been enjoying had ended?
2. Maintenance, How hard is it to keep up a boat in the southern sun? Damn hard. With an investment this large you don't even think about skipping something. We could do all our own repairs but it's still costly.
3. Lack of sailing. Taking a boat out for a day sail while living aboard full time isn't easy. Everything must be put away to go, everything on deck must be cleaned when returning.
4. Spouse's enjoyment. Does your partner really share your passion as much as you? Would she like more grandkid time? Mine did and that was good. Many times the husband is the sailer and the wife is new to the sport. DO NOT scare her showing off your skills! Biggest mistake we heard about.
5. Cost. A true crusing boat that you plan to sail 500 to 2000 miles off shore is a bit more expensive than a daysail boat or coastal cruiser.
6. Risk. Many boats can't be insured for their true value when sailing those 500 to 2000 miile offshore.
We love the fact that we actually sold the farm (truly did) and fulfilled our dream of cruising. If we hadn't done it then it would have never happened. Now back home we can enjoy the family as much as needed and with 3 sailboats to sail we can do what ever type of sailing we want.
What would we do different? We would buy a cheaper boat (something you could live with if lost)and kept the house. We would have kept the boat in the area we wanted to sail in for a couple of years and then enjoyed every day.
Just Do It!
Ray
We had a guy on one of the other forums from WI ask this same question. He had an O'Day 23 and he wanted to sell it and buy an O'Day 25. He also said that he was 81 years old and asked if he should be doing this.
What he was really asking us is, "Am I too old?"
I told him that he was as young as he felt and not to let age stop him from doing what he wanted to do. He was so happy that he made me a friend on Facebook. He sold the O'Day 23 and bought a full keel O'Day 25 with a roller trailer included. I'm sure that there will be days that he may not be up to going out for a sail, so what's wrong with just hanging out on the boat at the dock? I enjoy hanging out on the hook in some cove most of the time myself. I'll either cook something up, read a good book, or take a nap on board. To me, this is enjoyable.
One my my best YC pals who was in his mid 70s had gone through more sailboats and power boats while he was in the club. He had a nice O'Day 222 just like mine, same year in excellent condition, only used three times on a lake in New Hampshire. One day he got to feeling that he was too old to be sailing that boat and should get something a little easier to get around on like a day sailer. So he sold it and a few months later he was kicking himself. He kept on doing these kind of things through the years with different boats. I told him that the next time he gets these "feelings of doubt" to just wait them out and try to refrain from doing anything rash.
The last boat my friend Walter owned was a 2001 Mac 26 with a new 50 hp outboard and a Bimini Top and he really enjoyed that boat.
The key here is to enjoy the things that you like to do and if you find that you can no longer do them, move on to the next enjoyable hobby. I'm 68 but this is what I aim to do if and when that day comes. In the mean time Peter, I suggest that you just wait out these "feelings of doubt" in your life and give them time to pass.
Les, do you still do your own maintenance? How long have you owned the boat? We were just up in your area last year and really liked it. I am in my mid 60's and was wondering the same thing about how long to do it. I cannot see me not wanting to be on or near boats! Even as you say a "get away". My wife feels the same way and 8 years ago she had never been aboard one!
Had to laugh at your post Scott. I too was an avid Windsurfer and skier. We no longer ski and I finally had to just give my windsurfing equipment away after it had sat unused for 10 years. It is a selfish sport but it is what got me into a sailboat and I so much enjoy sharing my sailing with the spouse. My first wife never understood my addiction to sailing (windsurfing). Hopefully I never lose interest and/or the ability to continue doing it.
And sometimes I think my wife see it the same way.
Often I'll sleep on the boat, since it is on the way to the airport (I travel on business); I was there during a blizzard a few winters ago. Sometimes it's 1-3 day sailing trips alone. But whatever the case, she recognizes that I'm in a good mood when I return. I've had some quiet time and she's had some free time.
thinwater,
What a nice way to express it. I agree, 'cept I don't have the airport trip part of it.
Well said, and thanks,
Stu
What a nice way to express it. I agree, 'cept I don't have the airport trip part of it.
Well said, and thanks,
Stu
Wow, deja vu.... all of the above
Luckily I'm still with wife no.1 and she enjoys the sailing to a certain extent.
you all are so interesting!!
I hope we always have a boat to use in whatever way we want to... it is a very good part of our mental health. Actually, cool story, when my dad stopped being able to go down to his Catalina 27 his friend that occasionally would meet him down there asked if it would be alright if he went down and sat on it some days...Of course my dad handed him a set of keys. My dad has passed on, and we still see signs that his friend (late 80's for sure) has been aboard and it always warms my heart. Sometimes when I am visiting other marinas while going to a restaurant say, I will see an old guy stretched out in the cockpit of a ratty little boat with a beer in one hand and the other shielding the sun......and I can barely look away..I feel so connected.
I sure hope I never lose the nagging pull to our boat whether sailing or relaxing, I love it all. and I am the wife
I hope we always have a boat to use in whatever way we want to... it is a very good part of our mental health. Actually, cool story, when my dad stopped being able to go down to his Catalina 27 his friend that occasionally would meet him down there asked if it would be alright if he went down and sat on it some days...Of course my dad handed him a set of keys. My dad has passed on, and we still see signs that his friend (late 80's for sure) has been aboard and it always warms my heart. Sometimes when I am visiting other marinas while going to a restaurant say, I will see an old guy stretched out in the cockpit of a ratty little boat with a beer in one hand and the other shielding the sun......and I can barely look away..I feel so connected.
I sure hope I never lose the nagging pull to our boat whether sailing or relaxing, I love it all. and I am the wife
I hear you, my brother......... sometimes it seems more prudent to take the money we spend on maintaining a boat and just do a couple of charters each year. It seems like the sensible thiing to do....... but then..... your boat becomes part of you and your identity and until you can part with it emotionally the choice will always be difficult, physical ability or not. It's a very, very personal decision.
I can relate to everyone here. My Mac 22 has been my therapy session since I purchased her and brought her home for restoration. Now she sits on her trailer with mast up and ready for the water at a marina in the keys. Saturday (tomorrow) I drive down put her in the water and either sail around or gunkhole and stay the night. What a great feeling of peace and independence, my wife comes along sometimes but either way she doesn't stop me when she can't go. My father in his late 70's also come along for the ride and he enjoys it as much as I do, he looks forward to every outing and always planning the next trip. From reading the thread it seems we all share this common interest. The plan is to continue until I'm physically incapable.
Nodak7--I sort of planned for my retirement with my boat by selling my Hunter 380 and buying a new Hunter 27 but I ordered it the way I wanted it to be. I have roller furling main and jib, a Max prop, the WinchRite, a dodger, companionway doors, a cooler for the summer, a one burner stove and a microwave. It also has a Raritan head in deference to Peggy, a Wabasco furnace and it came with a good stereo.
The only maintenance that I do is wash her down. It's all new (well four years old now) so I have a company change the oil and cooling when needed, another company paints the bottom every other year and also dives on my boat twice a year for zincs and the Mac prop. I vacuum the boat every so often when I'm bored. The haul out and paint is around a thousand every two years. I do my own pump outs about twice a year with a rig that I roll to my boat. That is probably the hardest job I do.
I own a slip in Friday Harbor and live there in the summer. So I basically sail from Bellingham to Friday Harbor twice a year, about 21 nautical miles. I can do that in six hours. I mostly day sail by myself which I enjoy. I can do it my way. But on those days I don't want to sail I can read, listen to music (bless the iPod in my stereo) or nap. At the moment I visit my boat about three times a week during the winter--the recent snow slowed me up but I was there today. Forty degrees so I ran the furnace and the electrical heater for a while.
Biggest maintenance in the next couple of weeks is to buy new hand held flares to be up to date. Perhaps at the boat show.
I know my health is slowing getting worse from bad eye sight to a weak heart. But I'll be damned if I will give up my pleasures if I can still do them at this time. I'm happy.
The only maintenance that I do is wash her down. It's all new (well four years old now) so I have a company change the oil and cooling when needed, another company paints the bottom every other year and also dives on my boat twice a year for zincs and the Mac prop. I vacuum the boat every so often when I'm bored. The haul out and paint is around a thousand every two years. I do my own pump outs about twice a year with a rig that I roll to my boat. That is probably the hardest job I do.
I own a slip in Friday Harbor and live there in the summer. So I basically sail from Bellingham to Friday Harbor twice a year, about 21 nautical miles. I can do that in six hours. I mostly day sail by myself which I enjoy. I can do it my way. But on those days I don't want to sail I can read, listen to music (bless the iPod in my stereo) or nap. At the moment I visit my boat about three times a week during the winter--the recent snow slowed me up but I was there today. Forty degrees so I ran the furnace and the electrical heater for a while.
Biggest maintenance in the next couple of weeks is to buy new hand held flares to be up to date. Perhaps at the boat show.
I know my health is slowing getting worse from bad eye sight to a weak heart. But I'll be damned if I will give up my pleasures if I can still do them at this time. I'm happy.
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