Was your significant other into sailing?

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HOW Editorial

When you met your spouse or significant other, were they also into sailing? If not, did you teach them? How did it go? Do you sail together now? If they were already sailors, was it this passion that brought you together? What part does sailing play in your relationship with your SO. Inquiring minds want to know your story. Be sure to weigh in this week's quick quiz.
 
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Greg Beckner

sailing beginnings

My wife and I both had hectic careers and activities that were seperate from each other. We looked around for an activity that we could do together and as equal partners and decided to try sailing. We took a weekend course without one iota of prior boat knowledge and were lucky enought to find the perfect couples gig. That was 5 years ago and since then we have taken several courses, together and seperately , bare boated many times and eventually took the plunge and bought a boat ( a Hunter of course) together. Without sailing (and the sailing community) I am sure we would not be where we are today. I would hesitate to sail without my spouse as there is a level of communication and trust that would be hard to duplicate. By the way we split the captain 's duty very explicitely--when the engine is on she is captain, period. When the engine is off I have her permission to call myself captain as long as I say it very quietly and only to myself.
 
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Andy Hansom

Check your closet !!!!!!

I was cleaning out our closet a couple years ago and found some old sailing mags from the late 1980s. I knew they wern't mine so I asked my wife and she said she used to go crusing Baja Mexico with here friends and I used to race sailboats around So.Cal at about the same time. After selling my boat I never went sailing again until I found her magazines then we decided to buy a Hunter 340 and after 1 year we traded it up to a Hunter 380. Another great sailing experiance is we had our first baby about 1 year after getting our new boat Leslie and Andy Hunter 380 Vanishing Point
 
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Jay Kent

Long and short history of sailing

I have sailed since I was very little. Saved my lawn mowing money and boat a ten foot sailboat with my brother at age 11. Met my 'significant other' on a highway (she had a flat tire), when I was coming back from an afternoon sail. She had sailed about two times in her entire life - sunfish types. On one of our first outings, I took her on my Catalina 22. I have taught many people to sail, but she was, undoubtedly, my most intense student ever!! Much too instense for a cruiser sailing outing, I thought. But, now, we still sail the C-22 and own a Hunter 27, too. When we sail, I must ask "permission" to sail my own boats, and she doesn't give up the helm easily! Now, five years later, she and I got engaged over July 4 weekend. Who knows, the "honeymoon" could be on a sailboat! Can't say that the sailing is all there is to our relationship, but it is a "mutually interesting" part of what we do together. We both enjoy sailing, immensely!! Sometimes we both get obsessed!
 
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Charles Duhon

First mate, Play mate, Soul mate

I had invited one too many guests for a late night sail aboard my Mirage 236, and at the last minute one guest asked another if she could join us. Well, her name was Lynn and she was the only girl I had ever sailed with who wanted to know everything about sailing (and me). We talked as she took the helm and eventually put us into irons, thus began her sailing instruction. She later said that she had always wanted to sail but didn't know it! and I said if she didn't like sailing I would tie her to the mast with a glass of wine in her hand until she said she liked it! But seriously, several months later I proposed and gave her the ring on the boat. Its been 10 years since and she cried when we sold the boat we fell in love aboard. But later she played a major role in getting the best boat we could afford, a Hunter 34. Because I am an artist and Lynn is a musical artist and sailing itself is indeed an art, we named our boat "Artistry" She loves sailing as much as I, but she spends a bit more time at the bow with a wine glass in her hand than I do. But then again I have the bottle! She is still learning to be in control of this bigger boat and I am secretly enjoying her every accomplishment I love you, Lynn you truly are my First mate, Play mate and Soul mate. Charles Duhon "Artistry"
 
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Russ "Segue"

simple tactics...

When we first started going out, I found out that she used to sail with a former boyfriend. He was all racer, you know, no head, no extra water, gotta keep the weight down, blah-blah-blah... Well I introduced her to MY kind of sailing, cruisin' the U.S.V.I.,and the B.V.I. that was all it took. Soon as we arrived back in Boston, she started talking about buying our own boat. Its been four years now on our 280, and we love it! We spend as much time as we can on the water, and it is still not enough. I think you all can understand that. If you are ever in Boston, You can catch us on the Haabaah!
 
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Bob Schmit

Long Story

While doing 4years in the US Navy from '66 through '69 I got to appreciate the ocean and during the 4 months of every year my ship was in the states I tried sailing lessons. I guess I had always wanted to sail since then. Met and married my wife in '71 and got involved with college and work. Around '73 I started talking seriously about getting a boat and Karen even got swimming lessons just in case. She had never sailed. Unfortunately, we got sidelined with kids and more work. Then in 1996 we went to a boat show, looked at sail boats and all she said was if we get one it has to have an enclosed head... so we bought our h26 and have never looked back. Karen and I both love sailing . We learned from other boaters, my scant memory of those sailing lessons so long ago and my limited experience crewing on scows. It wasn't until last year that we both took lessons.
 
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Eric

Package deal

I was sailing long before meeting my wife and it was clearly stated that sailing was important to my well being and that she was more than welcome to partake in my obsession. She enjoys sailing but, after 20 years, is still not willing to actually participate but she can sleep on the low side in 25 knt winds and not be phased. Our original agreement is still in place and she can go or stay but I will always go. Not a problem and our understanding works out well. Now when it comes to my kids' hockey games in the early fall, that is another issue. I am very adept at running a scoreboard without to much grumbling.
 
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Psycho Sailor

Sailing brought us together and took us apart.

When we met years ago, she had never sailed and I had 15 years of sailing experience. It was something new for her (she used to race powerboats). At the start of the relationship, she liked sailing in a "passenger" sort of way. She could steer, but didn't really have a feel for it. Sail trim and grinding winches was not on her list of sailing activities. I wanted to send her to sailing school. She had no desire to go. We got along for many years but I don't believe she really shared in the sailing experience (except for the "passenger" mode). When the 25' boat was replaced with a 37', and the sailing moved from the lake to the ocean, and the duration of the cruises changed from hours to days, the significant other lost interest even more. She found other weekend activites. I continue to focus my leisure time activities around the sailing experience (about 4,000 miles per year). And so the relationship ended over irreconcilable differences (I sail, she doesn't). I liked Eric's response. The "package deal" he has with his wife seems to work well for them. I suspect that Eric is more tolerant of the "passenger" mode. Or maybe his wife is more crew than passenger. Those of you that are fortunate enough to share the sailing experience with your significant other, I envy you. Psycho Sailor ..._/)...
 
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Gary Baggett

Boy am I Lucky!

I crewed on many race boats in the early 80's, long before I met my wife. After a couple of years, I completely stopped sailing figuring that one day I would get back into it. Got married in 1990 and my interest in sailing increased. Picked up my monthly Latitude 38 and started looking for a starter boat. Then the kids started showing up! Fast forward 8 years... On a gloomy winters day as I was thumbing through a sailing mag, my wife said, "Why don't you just go buy a damn boat!" Within a week I owned a sweet little Santana 22. Took the wife and kids out and they all enjoyed the experience (remember this is winter on S.F. Bay - real light wind). Then came summer and the famous S.F. winds. Took the wife and kids out in a couple of good blows- scared the wife but good! Her response....we need a bigger boat! Went straight to the local broker and she bought me a new H290. The whole family now enjoys sailing and love their new boat!
 
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Sandy

Teaching him to sail

I have the opposite situation from most sailing couples where the man is the more experienced sailor. I had been sailing for two years and had recently purchases a Hunter 25 when I started dating my boyfriend. His only sailing experience had been an afternoon aboard a 45' tourist catamaran in the Bahamas--floating cocktail party. He now loves sailing, and the 25 footer is a great 2-person boat. I have tried to keep the teaching part very low key so that I don't sound like "Madam Instructor". Mostly I explain what's happening and why. His input and suggestions have been very helpful. I recently crewed for a friend on a 100 mile race (the only woman onboard), and he was my ground support!!
 
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David Krozier

The luckiest man yet!

I grew up in love with boats. My wife did not even see the ocean until her twenties, and until recently she was afraid to swim in water over her head. She still says boating is my thing. But, she will take the helm if needed, she sets and raises the anchor, sets and furls the sails, cooks, tends the dock lines, sunbathes, waves to the other boats, cleans, stows lines, picks up the mooring pendant, fills the water tank, and fends off when I occasionally get too close to the dock. She even climbs the mast when we need to make repairs. With the autopilot, I can pretty much singlehand our Hunter 27. And usually that's the way she prefers it. But its nice to have that extra hand sometimes. She knows red-right-returning, but she doesn't care to learn to navigate so I don't push it. She isn't interested in learning VHF protocol but she enjoys attending boat shows with me. So I always wear a PFD underway. In our six years of sailing together she has picked up some very salty habits. For example, she can't resist coiling the tails of other peoples dock lines so no one trips. One spring I let slip what all this means to me. We were preparing Renegade for launching. The yard is full of boatowners getting their boats ready for the summer season at that time of year. As usual, she was sanding the bottom in preparation for painting. I went over and told her that I was the luckiest man around. I said everyone in the yard noticed her and was jealous of me. Covered in bottom paint dust from head to toe (don't worry she wears a protective suit, goggles, and dust mask)she joked "is it because I'm so beautiful or because I'm painting the bottom." I said look around, do you see any of their wives or girlfriends around? They're jealous just because you're here sharing this with me.
 
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Justin Wolfe

Met my wife at the Yacht Club

I was teaching sailing. She was racing dinghies for the college that used yacht club boats. Our first conversation was "Wouldn't it be neat to sail around the world". Our first "date" was practicing together on my boat for a doublehanded race. Been living aboard ever since. When offshore we each take our turn. I sleep long & hard while she sails, steers, navigates, and takes care of our home/boat. To top it off my wife took 2 days off from work last summer to grind gelcoat off the bottom of our boat while I was at work. You shoulda' seen the look on the yard personnel faces when they saw my wife poke her head out from under the tarps after all that grinding. How did I get so lucky? Oh and she'd rather go sailing than buy a bigger boat...
 
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Paul Bednarzyk

Knot Again

Our story is that my wife is the one who got me interested in sailing. I have been around boats since I was 4 or 5 years old, but always power boats. After sailing with some friends and crewing on a J-24, I absolutely fell in love with sailing. We debated for a few years on whether to by a boat or not. About that time, Michele's mother passed away leaving her a modest inheritance. I decided that the inheritance was my wife's do with what she wanted. She ended up using to make the down payment on our H336 because that is what her mother would have wanted us to do with the money. After 3 years with the 336 we moved up to our H380 and this past spring we made our first trip to the Abaco's. While Michele still does not enjoy ocean sailing, she does enjoy sailing in protected waters and is quite good with the helm and can handle sails and ground tackle as needed. Today is our 10th anniversary and I am happy to say we have found a hobby/lifestyle which brings us closer together. Paul Bednarzyk S/V Knot Again
 
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perry baskier

once apon a time

I used to be the lucky guy that all the other sailers wonded about. My partner sanding the bottom and up the mast what ever it took. She sailed and took her turn at the helm. I must admit she realy didn't have much choise in the mater, my hole life is boats. I work in the industry, as a boat builder. But all that was then and this is now. My partner has taken ill with MS and hasn't been out on the boat with me in some time. I miss her and the old ways, so thouse of you who are as luck as I was get out there and enjoy. I'll be the guy sailling by with his dog, and wishing I to was one of the luck guys. I'll never give up sailing or boats, but it's much more fun with a life partner who enjoys it as well. cheers Perry
 
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Bryan C.

My wife was really into sailing ...

and then we got married! Sounds like a not untypical situation. Actually it's not too bad, she's willing to go on long weekend cruises with the kids, and I almost have her talking into a 1-2 cruise in a couple years...
 

Phil Herring

Alien
Mar 25, 1997
4,922
- - Bainbridge Island
Final results

Final results forthe Quick Quiz ending 8/14/2000: Was your spouse or significant other into sailing when you met? 86% No (240) 14% Yes (33)
 
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Paul

SignificantOther

Pam and I met and married (second for both)in 1999, I have been sailing for 20 years, she for 5. WE were introduced by her employer who made the sailing connection. We spend 110% of season on the boat on the go every weekend. Recently spent 2 weeks in Nantucket. The boat is one of the great definers of our relationship and brings us ever closer as a couple. WE will always own a boat!
 
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