Adjectives

[Ross]

I wonder why some people use the impersonal when referring to their spouse.
We have; in order: My boat, My car, My truck, My dog, My rum, and The wife or The admiral, The dinner plate, The engine oil.
Lest we become "the cash cow" or "the bringer of food" or " the grouch" we should take stock of how we referr to the lady that shares our secrets and keeps us from the cold.

 

[sailaway78]

Very Well Said

Very welll said Ross. You are one of the very few I see on here who call their wife by name.

 

[higgs]

As much as I would like the boat to be "our" boat, in reality it is my boat. My wife sails and cruises with me, but the vast majority of time "my" boat is asea she is not aboard.

 

[Ross]

Very welll said Ross. You are one of the very few I see on here who call their wife by name.

Maybe 43 years of mutual support has had an influence on me. I have had some rough times to get over and so has Nancy and through it all we have stuck together.

 

[zeehag]

i would like to know, also--after all, does being female make me the bag of wtf over someone's shoulder as my name?--i prefer MY name ! probably why i am still single!!!!!

 

[LuzSD]

I really enjoy the llittle side trips on this site...... this is a good one!
I have also noticed the references and it seems to be just a personal style.......but one that I would not like at all. I am referred to as my name always and we are partners with our boat, 100% as with our money, our house, our kids.

One reference I hear also is "the better half" and it makes my skin crawl to hear that. No doubt it is meant to be flattering (I guess) but I don't want that title.

 

[LuzSD]

"the lady that shares our secrets and keeps us from the cold."


Very nice expression, very nice!

 

[wonkodsane]

The Admiral knows her rank was earned and my use of it as her title is a token of respect.

 

[Buck420]

I wonder why some people use the impersonal when referring to their spouse.
We have; in order: My boat, My car, My truck, My dog, My rum, and The wife or The admiral, The dinner plate, The engine oil.
Lest we become "the cash cow" or "the bringer of food" or " the grouch" we should take stock of how we referr to the lady that shares our secrets and keeps us from the cold.

As you may know, some languages, (like Russian) do not use the words ... "The" or "a/an".

They, and others, contend that these words actually serve little purpose and that English communication might actually benefit if they were not used.
I suspect that your post might be ( an ) example of that contention.

 

[Paul J. Rusyniak]

My Wife and I will celebrate 45 years tomorrow.
She is not, and never has been, the wife or the admiral.
Paul
PS Ross, I also like that last phrase of your opening post!!! Well put!!!

 

[Ross]

The county sends a property tax bill each year to N.R.### and Wf and each tme it makes Nancy's blood boil.

 

[Chris Burti]

Simple...She gave me the devil the first time she read her name in one of my early posts an made it very clear to me that she did not want her name used in open forums on the internet.

 

[All U Get]

I wonder why some people use the impersonal when referring to their spouse.
We have; in order: My boat, My car, My truck, My dog, My rum, and The wife or The admiral, The dinner plate, The engine oil.
Lest we become "the cash cow" or "the bringer of food" or " the grouch" we should take stock of how we referr to the lady that shares our secrets and keeps us from the cold.

Hi Ross,
In NH it is common to hear "the wife, the boy, and the girl" from most everyone who is "native" to the area. I have been called a lot of names including "Better half" until one day I introduced MaryLou as the "Worse half". There was a brief flurry of adjectives and no "suppa". Consequently we now have neutral adjectives and I refrain in calling her friends "The Coven or Quilting Group". Seems like John Wayne never had trouble with this.
All U Get

 

[Winkfish]

Words are not inherently bad or wrong. It's all a matter of context, social norms, regional customs, and (mutual) personal preferences.

 

[Ross]

I had a friend who introduced his wife as his first wife. "This is my first wife Amy."

If anyone thinks that their life is at all private take a look at the junk mail that comes with a complete address.

 

[jibes138]

everyone is getting too sensitive. it seems I can no longer refer to my administrative assistant as my "secretary" or "the girl." I suggest all the men stick together on this or next thing you'll be doing your own laundry.
Frankly if I was offended by what the associates in the plant call me I would always be taking offense. :>)

 

[SeaRanch]

Where I live:
It is HER house, even tho my name is on the deed and mortgage, and I make the payments.
It is MY boat, even tho her name is on the title and mortgage, and I make the payments!

For some of us "the lady that shares our secrets and keeps us from the cold" does not apply.

Bill

 

[Ross]

everyone is getting too sensitive. it seems I can no longer refer to my administrative assistant as my "secretary" or "the girl." I suggest all the men stick together on this or next thing you'll be doing your own laundry.
Frankly if I was offended by what the associates in the plant call me I would always be taking offense. :>)

Try calling your shop foreman a straw boss and check you "look" you get. You can diminish a person or you can elevate a person by how you refer to him/her. Calling your son "the boy" when you introduce yourself is not nearly as good for your son as introducing him as your son John.
Too often we get lazy and insensitive in our relationships and we would not be pleased to be referred to in a dismissive manner by our wives or kids. If your kids referred to you as their "old man" to their friends instead of as their Dad, I dare say you would not be as pleased.

 

[packman]

Lucky

I admire your sentiment Ross, would that all of us were that lucky, or worked that hard to be true partners to our spouses. Congrats.

Richard

 

[ffaubert]

Wow, what great pot stirring.

So,.... according to Webster:

the - def. article - (refers to a particular person, thing, or type)
my - pronoun - pertaining or belonging to me

If I ever even hinted that Wendy was a possession of mine, she would happily remove two of my possessions.

Introductions - "This is Wendy." (followed by, "We're married." if it's required)

We've been married for 28 years. Seems to have worked so far.