When I am in the company of several people there is almost always more than one Nancy. So I refer to my Nancy to differentiate her from the other Nancys that may be a part of the conversation.
Adjectives
- Thread starter Ross
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I don't care for the expression "the wife" at all and don't use it. "The Admiral" on the otherhand is a favorite of mine on this web site. I smile every time I read it because of the respect it intones, at least for me. I was in the Navy for 24 years. There the Captain was truly the Captain of the ship and the Admiral was the passenger. The Captain had the respect and authority to handle the ship. But make no mistake, the Captain was outranked by the Admiral and that relationship was readily identifiable in some situations. So it is with me and my boat. I'm the Captain of my ship, but she's the Admiral. It is a nice sharing of authority and respect. Also, it's a nice change to actually be in love with the Admiral!
Guess I'm lucky there. Wendy doesn't seem to be as common as it used to be.
If I'm talking to someone about something to do with Wendy and they ask, "Which one?", I always point and say, "The cute one." She doesn't mind the "the" at all.
If I'm talking to someone about something to do with Wendy and they ask, "Which one?", I always point and say, "The cute one." She doesn't mind the "the" at all.
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It's awkward when a fellow with his wife refers to "my son," which makes you wonder if the son is from a previous marriage. Equally vexing is the mis-use of impersonal pronouns as in "the man that went to down to the docks."
I named two of my boats PENELOPE. She was my wife and my muse. She was my mate and first mate for 43 years. She has sailed on ahead of me.
There is an oft told tale of two friends, Bob and Jim, who sailed together for most of their lives. Sadly, Bob passed on. One night Jim was awakened by a Pssst. Pssst. He awoke and said, "Who's there." "Jim, It's me Bob." Jim asked "Bob did you get to heaven and if so is there sailing there?" Yeah I did and you bet there's sailing. Blue skies, 12 knots winds and you can take one tack forever. "Wow," said Jim, "That's great news." Bod said, "I have any better news, you're crewing with me tomorrow."
There is nothing--absolutely nothing worth doing as simply messing about in boats.
Keneth Grahame, The Wind in the Willows
Fair winds, Old Salt...
There is an oft told tale of two friends, Bob and Jim, who sailed together for most of their lives. Sadly, Bob passed on. One night Jim was awakened by a Pssst. Pssst. He awoke and said, "Who's there." "Jim, It's me Bob." Jim asked "Bob did you get to heaven and if so is there sailing there?" Yeah I did and you bet there's sailing. Blue skies, 12 knots winds and you can take one tack forever. "Wow," said Jim, "That's great news." Bod said, "I have any better news, you're crewing with me tomorrow."
There is nothing--absolutely nothing worth doing as simply messing about in boats.
Keneth Grahame, The Wind in the Willows
Fair winds, Old Salt...
1. I think we have gone blotto on the subject of sensitivity in this country. Everything that can come out of our mouths, or be written about, will conceivably “offend” someone. Take a chill-pill, man-up, get over it. We whine too much over perceived “slights”.
2. That being said, my personal pet peeve as a woman and wife is the term “admiral”. Ironic, since a woman came up with the term. However, on my boat, I am the captain, not a passenger, and having a T/T does not constitute a “fleet”. Don’t worry; I’ll follow my own advice from 1.
3. My husband Al respects me as a person, as his wife, captain and life partner. No matter how he has referred to me in person, in print, or to others, I know he has done so in a loving and respectful manner. Even the one time he called me admiral! It not always about the words, it’s in the tone and implications.
2. That being said, my personal pet peeve as a woman and wife is the term “admiral”. Ironic, since a woman came up with the term. However, on my boat, I am the captain, not a passenger, and having a T/T does not constitute a “fleet”. Don’t worry; I’ll follow my own advice from 1.
3. My husband Al respects me as a person, as his wife, captain and life partner. No matter how he has referred to me in person, in print, or to others, I know he has done so in a loving and respectful manner. Even the one time he called me admiral! It not always about the words, it’s in the tone and implications.
You are quite right. I have said many times, a dog know the difference between being tripped over and being kicked.
Actually, the correct use of the phrases Ross is talking about are called Grammatical Person, not Adjectives. If we refer to someone with their name, it is 1st Person, with 'my' would be 2nd Person, and with 'the', 3rd person.
In the Marine Corps, all recruits must refer to themselves in the 3rd Person. This is intended to strip the person of any identity. I.e. "The Recruit (3rd Person) request permission to speak to Drill Instructor Sgt [Name] (1st Person).
In the Marine Corps, all recruits must refer to themselves in the 3rd Person. This is intended to strip the person of any identity. I.e. "The Recruit (3rd Person) request permission to speak to Drill Instructor Sgt [Name] (1st Person).
Nice one Ross. A good reminder.
From now on I will be careful to refer to the future ex-wife as "my" future ex-wife.
Thanks, Liam.
From now on I will be careful to refer to the future ex-wife as "my" future ex-wife.
Thanks, Liam.
One of my favorite TV programs was Rumpold Of The Bailey. He referred to his wife as She Who Must Be Obeyed.. OK, not appropriate here but it was a funny program.. Many years ago after divorce, the woman I was hanging around with told me that she was Karen.. not any other name! so I learned .. a proper name is there for a reason.
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I refer to my ex-wife by a completely different adjective, not for polite company. Her lawyer too.
Most of the time it is less costly to keep a wife than to divorce her.
There once was a man in a bar drinking doubles and the bar keep asked what his problem was. The man said that thirty years ago he had asked his lawyer what would happen if he murdered his wife. His lawyer told him he would probably spend thirty years in prison. So he didn't kill her. The bar keep said, so aren't you glad . The man said think about it,, Tonight I would be a free man.
traditionally , women have been identity-less for many decades as "the wife" and other bland titles. dont you guys think that an identity would be a lil more respect-able than a non -id???? if a man had some respect for his woman, wouldnt he WANT to call her by name? or is it just EASIER to use the bland non-id nicks that have been in use for sooo long--i have known men who couldnt remember the name of "the gf"--she WAS "the gf"--i also noticed many of "the gf" ladies never made it to become "the wife"-whether it was due to the lack of respect or other reasons, i dont know. i know that if the guy i dated never called me by name and only called me "the____" (whatever the precedes) i would not hang around long......now, if it were MY gf, that's another story--that is some more personal than THE gf.....
(go figger)
(go figger)
Well sometimes it needs to be that way. "The Wife" never liked the boat, never wanted to be on the boat, tried to make me lose the boat in the divorce (and failed) She doesn't deserve the title of "The Admiral" and never will. Now on the other hand, my fiancee deserves the title of "Great and Wonderful". She's great when it comes to going out and sailing the boat, and a wonderful person for wanting to be with me on the boat all the time. Why couldn't I have met her 20 years ago instead of the other one!
Dave
Dave
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